Quotes
Season 1
Thelma - So I was walking accross the sports hall today. And who do I see banging a ball intently against the wall, but the lovely Troy. And I thought to myself, I thought, I bet Cassie would like to be that ball.
Cassie - [about the vase] found it
Thelma: Does it vibrate?
Thelma - I've got some cider, and some scones. I thought we could have a cream tea. Without the cream. And without the tea.
David Tyrel - Are you interested in history Cassie?
Cassie - Some of it.
David Tyrel - What does it teach you?
Cassie - That by understanding the past, it helps us to understand the future?
David Tyrel - It teaches you that no matter what you do with your life - in a hundred years time, no one will give a toss
Thelma - Well he's into that sex kitten thing isn't he?
Cassie - Thanks
Thelma - Well don't get me wrong. You're sexy - in an unsuspecting novice nun kind of way
Cassie - In your dreams
Thelma - Frequently!
Jo Watkins - Somethings up
Cassie - I'm addicted to free base crack
Jo Watkins - Right
Cassie - And I've taken to prostitution to feed my habit
Jo Watkins - Good choice
Cassie - do you think the Nephilim really exist?
David Tyrel - Absolutely! Most of them are in year 11
Thelma - Azazeal said it's not an accident you found the canary
Cassie - canari
Thelma - yeah that
Thelma - Have you any idea how frustrating it is being a lesbian ghost?
Thelma - Women run the world, men just shit in it
Cassie - You're the most dramatic ghost I have ever known
Thelma - Cassie - you never watched me play netball
Cassie - You were crap
Thelma - I was concerned about you. I was in the canteen and I had this strange feeling
Cassie - So did I - and you spoilt it
Themla - You've had a rough deal Cassie McBaine. Your dads' disappeared, your mothers' a nutter
Cassie - My best friend is a lesbian ghost
Thelma - Life sucks
Cassie - Apparently, I'm a witch
Thelma - Well, I could have told you that
Thelma - Children do that sometimes
Cassie - With eyes full of blood?
Thelma - They don't do that. Only manky possessed monsters do that.
Cassie - Why do I keep seeing her?
Thelma - Well there could be a number of reasons - hallucinogenic drugs, schizophrenia, too much cheese last thing at night
David Tyrel - And you'll have your boyfriend
Jo Watkins - Oh no. He no longer exists. Turned out to be an asshole
David Tyrel - Yes, we do have a tendency to do that
Thelma - I was ritualistically sacrificed by a fallen angel
Peggy - Ah the flu too ay?
Thelma - Down on your knees girl and scrub my floor
Peggy - your fantasy too?
Thelma - Let's face it, I'm a ghost, you're a witch and he's a fallen angel, anything's possible
Cassie - Lesbians have kids all the time these days
Thelma - Dead ones don't
Thelma - Well I'm told when a man and a woman love each other very much
Cassie - It almost always ends in tears
Thelma - That's heterosexuality for you
Thelma - When I know for a fact she fixed pass the parcel
Thelma - I think Jesus was a lesbian who loved too much
Cassie - What are you my dyke in shining armour?
Azazeal - Bet he's seen a lot!
Jo - nothing illegal
Azazeal - Shame
Azazeal - don't you just love it when you know its wrong but you're going to do it anyway
Azazeal - In the end desire is always greater then the consequences
Season 2
Cassie - I'm going to find Azazeal
Thelma - ok
Cassie - torture him
Thelma - right
Cassie - and then kill him
Leon - Sorry mate I'm going to be late - my service provider has gone down
Cassie - You can't just go around saving people's babies
Thelma - Tell that to Mother Theresa
Thelma - This place is really killing my medical fantasies
Cassie - What did you expect?
Thelma - Well nurses in PVC might be nice
Cassie - Thelma, most people come here to die
Thelma - Dead people still have desires you know
Cassie - Can we also pretend I'm an international pop star dating Brad Pitt?
Cassie - oh yeah, 'excuse me officer dr. Surtees stole my fetus, it's probably the child of the devil but I need to find my ex to be sure'
Felix - Is it Thelma?
Cassie - No, Thelma's fine, she's actually being really good at the moment
Thelma - I can only wear dead people's clothes
Thelma - I got mud on my new clothes
Thelma - I saw Azazeal. I thought he was going to kill me, which is stupid I know, as he already has
Thelma - Malachi is a bit of a shit name isn't it?
Thelma - But he's a drug dealer!
Leon - doesn't make him a bad person
David Tyrel - On the other hand we have fantastic works of art - which we occasionally have to sell to buy new computers
Cassie - You don't have an aura
Thelma - I do - it's purple
Thelma - What do you think her special power is?
Cassie - Well let's hope it's not a wip that makes people tell the truth as you'd be on your knees in seconds
Thelma - Of course by the time that reaches the news papers he will be the local paedophile who's an asylum seeker from Wales